Slaying the Green Eyed Monster: 5 Ways to Deal with Blogger Jealousy

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Have you ever felt jealous of another blogger? I'll be honest…I know I have. It doesn't mean I hate that blogger or that I wish ill on them or even that I dislike them. It just means I'd like to see some of the success they have for my own blog. Whether it's more readers , more speaking engagements, more brand collaborations, or more media mentions, it's easy to compare yourself with other bloggers and begin to wonder “When will my moment come?” But those feelings, left unchecked, can fester and turn into something truly nasty. So how can you control those feelings jealousy if they ever rise up in you? (And you folks who never get jealous? Keep on doing what you're doing…it must be working.)

Own those feelings.

Owning your feelings doesn't mean wallowing in them or nurturing them. It just means recognizing what you feel for what it is…without guilt or shame. When it comes to emotions, it's hard to deal with feelings you refuse to acknowledge, and ignoring jealousy can sometimes breed resentment, which is poisonous as a blogger because resentment blocks progress (and it's also just not a good way to be).

Look at yourself objectively.

And ask someone who knows you to help if it's hard for you. Remembering how far you've come as a blogger does a lot to lighten jealousy's weight. Let's be real…there will always be someone stronger, faster, smarter, prettier, wealthier, or more well-connected than you. But that does not invalidate your accomplishments and achievements. Spend a few minutes comparing yourself now with yourself from a few months or years ago. You may be pleasantly surprised at just how fast things are moving for you after all.

Turn jealousy into respect.

If you're jealous of another blogger, it's for a reason. They've done something to succeed. That is absolutely worth your respect. Which means badmouthing them or trying to undermine should never be on the table (both of those go beyond simple jealously and into outright maliciousness). If you're having trouble doing that (no judgment here), a quick ‘cheat' is promote that blogger on your own site or social media channels. It's really hard to feel angsty about someone you've just recommended to your very own readers.

Let your jealousy become motivation.

Take a good look at what's contributing to that other blogger's success and imitate it. Of course, some of the reasons for their success may be completely out of your control, but it's likely that you can do at least a few things they are. I'm not saying you need to copy their branding or their blog posts or their personal style (because you have your own audience, right?) but if you see a strategy they're using to great effect, consider implementing it yourself. Can you blog 5 days a week instead of 3? Can you tweak your headlines for better SEO? Would it make sense to spend a little more time on Facebook and Twitter? Observe, then implement.

Remember that the world of blogging is constantly changing.

Just because someone's popular now doesn't mean they always will be. Your day could very well be in the future. There is always room for new, exciting content. There are always readers looking for someone who speaks directly to them. And the media is always looking for a fresh new voice or perspective. Sometimes a little extra push of effort and a little extra patience is all it takes.

Jealousy doesn't have to be a bad thing. Let it be an asset to you as a blogger. Acknowledge it, own it, then use it to make you work smarter and harder.

How to handle feelings of jealousy when they come up in blogging? Any advice to take care of those feelings?

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3 Responses

  1. Seppy

    What a great article (especially since I was JUST browsing some of my favorite blogs and having some envy)

    You make really good points : jealousy usually stems from wanting what you don’t have. But it’s definitely a good time to look into what you have accomplished, and using that emotion into something positive – Motivation! Motivation to create what you want to create!

    I really really liked this article! Thanks Cora for a good reminder of things that I knew but might forget from time-to-time.

    http://www.seppysmontreal.com

    Reply
  2. Bike Pretty

    I’m definitely guilty of professional jealousy. But once I started blogging, I realized how I can use that emotion to create awesome content.
    Thinking “I want her life/shoes/job/bike!” means I’ve found something I can write about passionately.
    And now when I *don’t* feel that way, it’s almost a sign that I shouldn’t bother with that topic.

    Reply
  3. Jeanine Marie

    I am not jealous of anyone in particular. It does bug me when someone rises to the top in less than a year. However, I don’t want to put the energy into negative
    feelings. I want to put my energy into my own blog that is in a starter phase and grow from there.

    Reply